I want others opinions on this.....what do you think of my ex (the father of my baby) ?

[moi]

He told me that if I had an abortion that him and I could stay together and that if i didnt we couldnt.So then he breaks up with me and now tries to deny that it was because I refused the abortion....(He seems to deny everything he says these days) so anyways.....now today I emailed him and told him that they scheduled my ultrasound for May 8th and I said it would be nice if he could come....he emails me back and says he can't because he don't have the money....he is in Canada but i'm in michiga and it's a 6-7 hour drive depending on the border and traffic/weather,etc....but, he had no problem doing this before I told him I was pregnant....now all of a sudden he has no money....this man lives in a house that has a $1000 a month mortgage and he has credit cards and money for things that he wants/needs etc.... but,now all of a sudden he don't have $100 gas money to come here or to buy the baby anything(he says he's going to get it some things from the free places) and he says that

he cant give me much child support at all (I think he mentioned/plans on giving me like 100 or less a month) and this man makes 60 grand a year and has no other kids....I don't mind taking used items but I mean it's rediculous how he' being,so I want to know if anyone else agrees with me that it's wrong for him not to go to his baby's ultrasound(this is the 20 week one where they can see if it's okay,and the sex,etc...) and also if they agree with me that he's being a total butt about all of this?

I am so heart broken about all of this...

I really wish he would have agreed to go...

I think I'm going to be giving birth to this baby all by myself as well and that makes me so depresed....

all my family is in Ohio

so I have no support

I only have one friend in real life too and she will probably be the one watching my other kids when I give birth

so I will be there all alone

I dont know what to do

 

[proudmomandexpecting]

i think you should hit him with child support. take him to court and get the judge to give the amount of child support. that way if yal just agree to it, without going to court, he can stop paying you. but take him to court and if he doesn't pay, they will garnish his pay check.

 

[somebodyd]

sounds like he is a jerk and may be trying to squirm out on you. Good luck because I really do not know how the laws are with him not living in the states on child support.

 

[BeckyK]

If he denies that he is that father, all you have to do is get a court order for him to take a paternity test, which will prove whether or not he is that father ( i dont know your situation, and im not trying to say anythin, just being neutral) and then the court will order him to pay child support. They will set the amount. It should be around a third of his pay, and if he doenst, then he will go to jail.

 

[klassiq]

he is an A**... take him to court and sue him for what hes got.

 

[Muse-ViktorsMommy]

It's not wrong of him to not want to see the ultrasound; he's made it clear he wants nothing to do with the baby or you anymore. You need to just burn this bridge; trying to get him involved will only stress you out. He's a jerk and not worth your time.



However, you can make sure he gives you the proper amount of child support by taking him to court over it. Speak with a lawyer.

 

[angie12898]

he is being a total butt about this and if he doesnt want to be there it is his loss hun you just enjoy your u/s also let him know he doesnt get to decide how much support he pays the judge will decide how much he has to pay and if he is making 60 grand a year it will be more then 100 a month good luck hun dont let the jerk stress you out

 

[Tay]

get as much child support as you can from that loser

 

[Sasha]

He's totally being a jerk! He sounds like he's afraid of being a man! You can try to hit him up for child support, but since he's in Canada...I'm not sure how that would work. All you can do is hope that when you send him the pic of the ultra sound or the baby when their born that he decides to grow some cajonas and be in your child's life. It's his loss! But, one of the things that always keeps me sane is knowing that everything happens for a reason. We might not know what it is now, but one day we will. Good Luck!

 

[jrescigno]

Okay he is not just being a total butt about this, he IS a total butt! Being pregnant is generally emotion for most people but you could have stopped at the original ultimatum he gave you (when you first told him that you were pregnant) and I would have told you that this is a toxic relationship.

Go do whatever paperwork that you need to do to get the child support ball rolling (figure of speech) and then take someone who is supportive and consistent in your life to your ultrasound. He honestly doesn't sound that interested. Drop him like a bad habit! I know that sounds harsh but you should be enjoying your pregnancy, focusing on taking the best care of yourself possible and preparing for your new baby. Good Luck.

 

[ANTActress]

Yeah, he's definitely wrong! Wrong for saying if you have the abortion the 2 of you can stay together. What kind of man is that, honestly?! He's being selfish and just adding more stress on you- stress that you don't need right now. Though it may be hard and seem impossible you can go through this pregnancy without him. Even though your family is in Ohio they can still be of support, and so can your friend. Don't feel you need him in your life in order to be a great Mother and to make it through the pregnancy. It's just ridiculous that he wouldn't want to take part in something so precious and beautiful- something he helped to create. It's definitely his loss, not yours or the babys. Just stay encouraged, keep praying, and remain positive! You'll be fine! Best wishes to you and your little one...)

 

[Daniele]

Take his ass to court. OMG sorry that was alittle rude, but if he has that much money, then he can pay way more the 100$ amonth. My dad has to 495.50 every two weeks for his son and we don't make that much money. Very good, you didn't have a abortion. He is a big DUMB ASS. Your better off without that jerk. Hey email me with what you are having, [email protected]

 

[PinkL]

I suggest counting him out and focusing on u and your baby. he is selfish and u dont want anything like that around your child. I say seek counseling so you can have the right mindset before this baby is born. Having a child is a beautiful thing. And if he does not want to take part that is his loss, he will regret it in the future.

 

[drunkpunkbc]

He wants nothing to do with the child now and he has made that clear to you. Concentrate on you and your unborn child right now. If he dumped you because you got pregnant, he is not worth it. After the child is born go after child support. If he makes 60 a year, they will be taking out at least 100 a week.

 

[MKerrRNLD]

lol I'd like to see him tell a judge that he cant pay more than 100.00 a month childsupport on 60K a year!!!



Take him to court girl!!!!

 

[CaseyH]

I am sorry to hear about your problem that really sucks. This is one of the reason why I really think people should wait to get married to have sex or get pregnant. I think that when you are not married men seem to think that sex is just a fun activity and if an unwanted pregnancy results they think its okay to turn and run. I do realize that husbands sometimes do this as well but not near as often as boyfriends because of the commitment level. I think you should probably cut your loses and chalk this up to a hard lesson learned. Maybe you should consider moving so you would be close to your family. I really hope that things look up for you. Try to not be too depressed or stressed out he is a jerk and you deserve someone that will love you and your children Good luck I wish you the best

 

[MissUnknown]

Honey, anyone that would give you that ultamadium is not even worth being in your or your child's life. True, you cannot make him be in your or your child's life, but you can get his support financiallly..



I would no longer waste time and effort trying to get him to be in the child's life. Just focus on you and your unborn baby. It is his loss if he does not want to be part of it. You shouldnt want anyone like that in you or your baby's life anyway. He is not even worth the email you sent him. Enjoy your pregnancy and good luck!

 

[ProfessorC]

Simple, he does not want a child. He feels you betrayed him.

 

[josephineoftheswamps]

You're better off without him. I broke up with my boyfriend when I was 3 months pregnant with my 1st. He was there when I forced him to be, but he wasn't really there, he'd sit there looking bored... he was absolutely no support during the labour or after birth. So I think you're better off without him. You can force him to pay child support once paternity is proved after you've given birth and he'll have to give you a decent amount. If I were you and really concerned... I'd highly consider moving back home where you'll have family & friends around you. See if you can find a supportive friend to go to the ultrasound with you, but you'll enjoy seeing your baby anyway : )



I believe things will work out for you eventually. Congratulations! and good on you for chosing to keep the baby : )

 

[KammiesMommy]

Wow he sounds like a winner. You're not alone my baby's father is acting the same way. If you ever need to talk feel free to email me. I thought i was the only one going throguh this but it amazes me how many guys bail after they found out you're preggo.